As my children grow older, we are starting to see some of the fruits of whatever parenting wisdom we’ve somehow induced into our children. This past weekend had a few moments where I felt awful proud of my kids and how they have grown and molded. The four year old still has some rough patches that need to be ground out, but hey, he’s four.
This Friday/Saturday was Momma-goes-retreating weekend so I had the first half to myself. I took the opportunity to abandon them. Well not abandon them per se, but allow them to co-habitate for a while with another large group of kids while me and fellow bachelor for the night went and saw 300. The payoff was that all 9 children/teens still had all their limbs attached when we got back a scant 2 hours later. No bruises, or cuts. There was a sliver that had to be excised, but some ice, a needle and a pair of tweezers made quick work of that.
Post movie madness, I took my brood of four to Wally World to shop for a present for the forty-fourth Pirate themed party of the year that Danny would attend in the morning. While it was kinda dicey taking the somewhat tired four year old shopping at 9:30 PM, I was proud of my older boy taking said brother under his wing and helping him along. In and out in 30 minutes wasn’t too hair pullingly bad.
Then morning drive to the pirate bay (20 minutes away) to attend the party, and having even the 12 year old join in the festivity with gusto (she brought her own pirate garb, and they all have their assigned pirate names, gratis multiple talk-like-a-pirate linkages). I stole away with the non-invitees during the lunch/present/cake phase, to feed them from the TriplePlay KFC-Pizza Hut-Taco Bell mashup, and then got myself some life preserving Starbucks for the second half of the day. They all played well, and again no puncture wounds or bruised pride.
Sunday after church was the biggest challenge, and the biggest pay off. Four families from church decided to go to lunch together. A table for 19 is a bit dicey at 12 PM in these parts, but we accepted a table for 6 and a table for 13 in the outer rim of the On The Boarded establishment. On this occasion the table of six was actually the ‘kids table’ for the non-toddler set, and all four of my kids sat, actually. sat. at that table and set a good example for their younger compatriots. Truth be told, they probably acted more polite than us brutes at the big boys table. But somehow through the 2 hour ordeal they survived without any bruised eyes or egos.
So Huzzah, this whole parenting thing is reaching the payoff stage. Now I need to find my rifle to clean and sword to polish for when the young men start stopping by to woo my gels. They won’t be chased away, but they might swallow a bit hard.
UPDATE: Extra bonus footage of eldest gel performing at the 6th grade choir performance over at Sweet Bippy.
That’s an awesome story, Jon. You are so lucky to be able to grow into being a parent as your kids grow up.
With the nasty business with my ex-non-wife and now being on the road, I never had the chance to grow into being a dad. Frequently I find myself at a loss on how to deal with certain problems (especially those involving a certain adult, if you know what I mean) when I am home. I’d appreciate any advice you can give me.
Hey Jason, I don’t know all of the small parts of your situations. I do pray for you though.
Ever watch Friday Night Lights? There is a great scene where the parents Taylor admit they have no idea what their doing. That is where I am, but I know I want a couple things with my kids. First a relationship that is built on trust and good communication (that will be a challenge for me, because yah, me and talking, not so great, especially about my feelings) and Second, I’m in it for the long haul. They’ll never have another Dad, and I’ll never have another Lauren, Brenna, Daniel or Michael. I plan on living a while, so they’d better get used to me. 🙂
Keep hacking, work on the small things, and do them well. You’ll be rewarded.
It’s such a long story and, except for the damage done, it’s long over with now (Thank God). Perhaps I’ll email you the details. Though I have forgiven my ex-non-wife (I found out that we weren’t legally married in the middle of the divorce).
Friday Night Lights? Is that a TV show or something? I’ve never heard of it. Besides, I don’t even have a TV on the truck.
My biggest problem is that I’m never around to be with them. I spend 3-4 weeks out on the road, go home for 3-4 days (we get 1 day off for every 7 spent out of the house). And when I am home, I have a certain busybody step-family member that gets in the way of my doing anything with the kids.
Though I have been conspiring with my dad (who has managing conservatorship) to bypass Mrs. But-in-ski. He’s on the road a lot with his job though, so things don’t always work out.
I was really proud of ALL our “kids” at the kids’ table. I’ve come to realize that one of the biggest ways God blesses me is the way he saves my kids in spite of me…How they manage to be such decent, kind, friendly, outgoing kids despite having a mom and dad who are stressed, frazzled, tired, and grumpy most of the time it seems.